When my kids were small, someone told me to combine acknowledgement of their accomplishments with small challenges just out of their comfort zone. That is how children learn. It makes them feel confident.
While adults are not much different, today’s world is not set up that way. We have a more diverse workforce than ever before and more people have more opportunity. On the flip side, that makes for an extremely fluid and competitive workplace. We have less job security and have to spend more time on career management. On top of that we are constantly reminded, on our 3-6 devices, that today’s most successful people have rejected the world’s top academic institutions and traditional career paths. The road to success is not clear, but the pressure to succeed BIG is greater than ever. And the secret sauce being sold to us is confidence.
It’s normal to wish for that goshdarnit, once-and-for-all, permanent state of confidence! It’s also normal to slip in and out of periods of confidence, and to feel confident in some areas of your life more-so than in others. It’s even normal to compare yourself to others. In the public speaking coaching I do, students often express feeling like they are the only one who is nervous because others look so calm. Yet when they see themselves on video, they realize that they too look calm. Like the students, you probably look more confident than you feel.
As we explore this topic together, here are a few questions to consider:
- What do you want your work & life to look and feel like in 20 years? Is it the same as the “Joneses?” In what ways is it your own?
- What are you most proud of, not just in what you’ve done, but in who you are?
- What areas of work or life do you feel pretty good in, and where would you like your confidence to grow?
- What beliefs hold your back?
- What do you do in the gray zone?
- When do you give up?
And finally, if you had to give your confidence a number from 1-10 today, what would you give it and why?
More to follow and have a great week,
Claire