This weekend I watched “Young Adult” with Charlize Theron. It is by the writer of Juno and was much more thoughtful than I expected. It is about a woman who at 37, hates her job and can’t find a good relationship. The movie tells the story of her going a little crazy for a little while as she makes some bad choices.
What struck me is just how common and relatable a story hers is. It is quite common for adults to reach a transitional stage around 28-30. We have proven ourselves and learned early professional skills, then begin to want to focus more fully on what we are really good at. Layer in the effect of the women’s movement on our career aspirations, and the delay of marriage and motherhood, and you have a perfect storm. We look successful on paper, but feel frustrated and lost inside.
How do you avoid making bad choices? How do you know when a new job, boyfriend or project is really just a delaying tactic? How do you know when it’s time to let go and either ask for help or really shift your strategy? I believe that we do it when we are ready. And the answer is part introspection, part strategy and information gathering. Either way, it begins with an awareness of the situation and really being kind to ourselves. It is not our fault, but the decision to make a change is ours to make. This morning I found a link to some tools that can be a starting point http://www.thecoachingtoolscompany.com/Free_Resources.php