One of the things I encounter with coaching is that people are very uncomfortable telling their story. Yesterday’s HBR Daily Idea was about this topic. Clients will say, “What about that time, in 1993, when my promotion was delayed by six weeks because the company was being acquired?…How will I expain it in an interview??!!”
Have you ever been to an event where you hear a panelist talk about how they were in Job A, then were asked to take on Job B, and after being offered several competitive positions, chose Job C, which led them to becoming CEO and Chairman. Why do they do that? I think they mean well, but really…. The truth is that, once it all works out, we forget the hard stretches. It’s from that place of confidence that the challenges and detours look more like enrichment than bumps. Steve Jobs’ random calligraphy class, and his getting kicked out of Apple in 1985. In hindsight, those bumps and detours were integral to what made him great.
While the occasional employment gap may need to be massaged, I find that the first step to being convincing is to own it. Get in the mindset that most of what you’ve done has been intentional. A random calligraphy class is a sign of a hidden interest. A period of being passed over for promotion was the moment you decided to take a risk and push through to the job you love. Speaking optimistically about past challenges is not a sign of being flippant; it is a sign of resilience. Here are a couple of tools I like to use for telling your story:
- You are a 65 year old panelist. Everything has worked out and you are explaining why you did what you did, what decisions guided you along the way, and who you discovered yourself to be in the end. What would each experience have meant? How did it help you get clearer?
- The bumps and challenges. What did you learn from each one? What actions did you take to face the challenge? How were you courageous?
- The bumps and challenges, part 2. What is it about those experiences that make you uncomfortable? Take a moment to come to terms with it and move past it.
- How will what you’ve learned make you good at the job you are going after?
And remember, knowing your story is as true for job hunting as it is for promotion. It’s not “You, only better,” it’s the real you.
Enjoy the changing leaves,
Claire
Claire – this message really lands for me. It is in owning our FULL story that we are interesting! If it is always sunny, you forget how magnificent a sunrise and sunset can be when it is the clouds that help bounce all that magnificent color around. I’ve also felt such freedom and relief in owning my full story of success – which includes some not so pretty flailing about! xoxo