You prep a presentation. Then you worry for days because in your enthusiasm, you spoke over your boss’s boss.
You say you’re a perfectionist, but really you burn yourself out with overwork.
Or maybe you keep putting off the thing you dream of because you have to come out of the gate doing it super well.
You get frustrated with people on your team who are clearly incompetent, and don’t understand why others don’t see it.
You do so much for others, only to be disappointed when they don’t respond in kind.
You’re not alone. The Inner Critic is at the heart of every scenario above. And it’s universal. You can learn time management, better listening, managing your boss, influencing others, but if you’re not aware of your inner critic those tools will only take you so far. If the critic is undermining your confidence, you are suffocating the very strengths and talents that make you shine when you’re at your best. And that is costing you productivity.
Over the next several weeks I’ll be diving deeper into Positive Intelligence, a tool I’ve used over the years to help hundreds of clients conquer their inner critic and find confidence in any situation. Please stay tuned. In the meantime, you can learn about your own inner critic at: https://www.positiveintelligence.com/assessments/
And try this: Next time you experience any of the scenarios I outlined above, or you feel frustrated, anxious or critical, try this small shift. Instead of saying, “So and so is an idiot!” say, “My inner critic says ’So and so is an idiot.’ “ Or instead of “I can’t figure it out; I’m not a tech person,” say, “My inner critic says I can’t figure it out because I’m not a tech person.” Or instead of, “I can’t believe So-and-so didn’t do the analysis I asked for after I helped him with his presentation,” say “My inner critic can’t believe….” You get the picture.
That little action of separating you from the voice is so powerful. And it’s amazing that once you start, you will see the inner critic everywhere. So for now, just notice.
More to follow…